Narcissistic personality disorder | Abusive Narcissists

Narcissistic personality disorder

Let’s take a sneak peek inside the minds of those dealing with a partner/spouse with a narcissistic personality disorder.

Is their work truly deserving of such praise?

Is it true that no one else is capable of finishing tasks?

I find it simple, so why can’t I get all that praise?

Is it possible that I have a limited intellect that prevents me from perceiving things as they are?

Are they the only ones who can solve problems?

Stay tuned! as we answer all those questions and learn more about narcissistic personality disorder.


Who are narcissists?

Narcissists; are persons who have exaggerated self-esteem and need excessive praise and admiration for their appearance.

They usually enjoy being photographed and staring in the mirror, admiring their beauty.

But in fact, narcissistic behaviour is not confined to that.

The narcissist lacks empathy for others and respect for their feelings that negatively affects their emotional and social relationships.

A narcissistic personality disorder is a mental state in which a person overstates his perception of importance and magnificence and believes he is entitled to endless praise and attention.

As a result, his relations with others are always under tension; because he does not receive the respect and attention he thinks he deserves, making him unhappy and dissatisfied with his life.


What causes narcissistic personality disorder?

Although there are no definite and exact reasons for narcissism, there are a few possible factors, including:

  • A neurological disorder; that impacts the brain-behavior link.
  • It may be an inherited genetic disorder.
  • Excessive parental pampering in childhood.
  • Early childhood exposure to psychological trauma.
  • Excessive parental control.


What are the biggest signs that someone has narcissistic personality disorder?

The traits differ from one person to another according to the type and severity of the disorder. As follows:

  1. An exaggerated sense of self-importance.
  2. The sensation of belonging to the highest category of intellectual people who can’t communicate with others; they believe others don’t understand them and are less intelligent than they are.
  3. Despite their lack of justified accomplishments, they are constantly in need of praise, admiration, and affirmation from others of their superiority.
  4. They dominate conversations and impose their opinions.
  5. They are always concerned with the idea of perfection and that they deserve the best in everything.
  6. Irrational envy of people around them, also their belief that others are constantly altering them and do not want them to succeed.
  7. Manipulation and reliance on others to reach what they need.
  8. The narcissist is incapable of considering and acknowledging the sentiments of others.
  9. Arrogance and smug behavior towards others. Especially those who are financially and scientifically inferior to them.
  10. Behind this ego and pride, a fragile personality lies deep within the narcissist. It only appears when facing someone else or when others criticize or violate their opinions.

Hence, it explains the intense and different reactions of a narcissist person

when he meets criticism or face rejection of demands, such as:

  • Impatience and anger.
  • They accuse others of neglect, especially close people.
  • To prove that they are the best, they show contempt and belittlement from others (critic).
  • Feeling frustrated and depressed is so easy when not achieving their aims.
  • They feel humiliated by outpouring negative thoughts hidden beneath the aura of glory.


Types of narcissistic personalities

Narcissistic personality disorders include various types and differ in their severity and prominent features, such as:

Healthy narcissistic personality

That’s true; healthy narcissism exists!

A person can have a tolerable level of narcissism if it helps him realistically assess his accomplishments and the status he deserves.

The individual’s healthy narcissism manifests itself in life. 

For example, one refuses to accept a job he is overqualified for or pay that is not appropriate with his efforts and accomplishments.

Grandiose Narcissism

It is commonly known as explicit narcissism, and it is the most common type of narcissism.

Grandiosity is an unrealistic sense of superiority and success. 

A person is characterized by; an exaggerated sense of unrealistic superiority and success and relies on imposing dominance over others.

A grandiose narcissist is a demanding person who demands regular public praise, even when it is at the expense and interest of others.

A grandiose narcissist does not prefer teamwork.

Since he always believes that he is capable of doing the hard work alone and prefers to keep all success to himself.

Vulnerable Narcissism

Vulnerable narcissism is the opposite of grandiose narcissism.

A vulnerable narcissist is shy and introverted; which makes him aloof and sensitive to people.

Also, he is always envious of others and eager to capture their attention.

Consequently, it causes him to respond rashly when confronted with criticism.

Malignant Narcissism

It is the most dangerous and manipulative type. 

The narcissist intentionally harms others without regard for their feelings or sorrows.

They exhibit no concern for the individual who has been harmed and, they have no intention of assisting.

Cerebral and somatic narcissism

These two are; fundamentally opposed as appearance and substance and heart and mould.

A cerebral narcissist shows off his knowledge and believes that he is the smartest and the most informed. 

As a result, he despises others, particularly those less knowledgeable than him.

While somatic narcissism is preoccupied with a person’s exterior appearance and merely physical beauty, he is not concerned with his intellect or rank; external appearance has priority.


Narcissists in relationships

Narcissists in relationships

Studies revealed that narcissists, despite the sense of grandeur and superiority over others, are dissatisfied with themselves and their lives in general, making them more susceptible to depression.

They have emotional issues, leading them to break up with their partners.

Narcissists are considered a source of harm to their partners, whether by treating them with condescendence, belittling them, or constantly accusing them of not caring.

However, the harm inflicted on those around narcissists is that they are indifferent to the feelings and rights of others.

Narcissists depend on criticizing and channeling contempt against others which negatively affects their self-confidence.

Dealing with a narcissist can also negatively affect others, who avoid participating in discussions or giving their points of view for fear of being ignored.


Complications of narcissistic personality disorder 

Complications of narcissistic behaviour include:

  • Workplace and social problems.
  • Difficulties in communications and managing relationships.
  • Feeling depressed and anxious along with health issues.
  • Drinking alcohol and taking drugs.
  • Frequent suicidal thoughts.


How to diagnose narcissistic personality disorder?

Diagnosis depends on several narcissistic personality disorder tests, such as:

  1. The appearance of signs and symptoms related to the disorder.
  2. Physical examination to neglect somatic issues that may cause the symptoms.
  3. Psychiatric assessment may include filling a survey.
  4. Assessment according to the criteria of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5), published by the American Psychiatric Association.


Communicating with narcissists

Some people with (narcissistic personality disorder) do not experience any significant or visible symptoms, making it easier to communicate with them.

On the contrary, people having severe and explicit symptoms must consult a therapist; to assist them in overcoming this disorder and minimize the adverse effects.

Here are some techniques to communicate with narcissistic persons:

Dealing with them while keeping their true worth in mind

A narcissist tries to create a superior image of himself, especially among people to, steal the spotlight by using great ideas and making a lot of promises.

So, one should be cautious of being swept away by the narcissist by evaluating and noting how he deals with others.

 If he lies and insults others, you should cope with his false reality and unrealistic promises.

Also, realize that your benefit is the last thing that interests a narcissist.

Stop praising and focusing on him

You must understand that once you enter the narcissist’s circle and focus on him, you will be unable to quit and will always try to satisfy him without regard for your own needs or personal interests.

Therefore, you must avoid falling into the trap of caring for and pleasing the narcissist from the start.

Defend your opinions and thoughts

We sometimes prefer silence to argument, but this does not sit well with the narcissist, who will either reinforce his position or dismiss you as a result of your silence.

Hence, you must respond assertively and not let him put you down.

Set boundaries that satisfy you when dealing with him

Set boundaries for your satisfactory interaction with the narcissist to ensure healthy interactions that do not harm your dignity or self-esteem.

If the person is someone close to you or someone significant in your life, tell them what you don’t think is acceptable.

However, if the narcissist’s mistakes are unacceptable to you, such as attempting to impose an idea or insulting you; It is preferable to avoid this character and remove him from your life.

Finally, we recommend that you consult a specialist if you suffer from at least 55% of the symptoms of Narcissistic Personality Disorder mentioned above.

Also, if you are in the presence of a narcissist, we recommend that you use the proper coping strategies to avoid any harm.

Read Also;

Types and symptoms of obsessive-compulsive disorder 

Anxiety disorders treatment | When will my mental storm calm down?f

Translated by
Dr. Shrouk Osama
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